People that Don’t get racism…and Yeah i like the OC

So I have been getting a lot of responses to my posts on the movie Hancock (and when I say a lot I mean like 3). It seems a lot  of people (again like 3) think I am “reading too much into the film.” Well people, this is what i gotz to say;

I am NOT completely sorry you don’t get it. At least this way I am guaranteed to have a job in the future. See, as long as people don’t get it my AAS and WGS (african american studies and women and gender studies respectively) majors are worth something. As long as you don’t get it my ability to talk about racism, sexism, classism, and every other ism will be worth something.  It is kind of like how Superman needs lex luther. I need people like you. i need you to look at a movie and just be like “yo, who cares, it is just  a movie…i mean will smith is in it and he made millions so how can it be racist…yo stop taking yourself so seriously…yo your accusations about white people are the racist things” so I can write books explaining why you are totally IN THE FUCKING DARK! So yeah, thanks.

On another note. I love the OC. Only because it provides brilliant fodder for gender and racial readings and because Ryan Atwood always knows exactly when to leave a scene. God I wish I knew how to just drop some knowledge and walk away. I have a tendency of staying around too long. But Ryan, man, he always just says the right thing…makes you think, and then just walks away. I am going to try this. I am going to try to be terse and to just say a few words and peace. We will see how this translates to Berlin…maybe it is a west coast thing. Time will tell.

Anyway expect an analysis of the OC sometime soon.

More Racism in Hancock

So like I said in the First Hancock is Racist post HERE i found Hancock to be a little problematic on the racial tip. However,while running the other day i found yet another reason why this film is racially fucked…warning spoilers

So, in the flick you learn that Will Smith is a reluctant superhero. He is a belligerent drunk that saves shit, but does so in a really unpleasant and rather destructive way.

Jason Bateman takes him under his white holy wing and shows him how to play nice.

During Batemans act of racially fucked philanthropy Charlize Theron (bateman’s wifey…or baby mama as FOX NEWS would call her if she were black (see them calling Michelle Obama such HERE)–you fucking racist pigs) gets all testy and doesn’t like her husbands decision all the while giving Smith looks.

It becomes obvious that Smith and Theron had something, but what we learn is like one big hop skip and jump back to miscegenation laws of yester year.

So Theron and Smith are paired. They are drawn to one another in this film. But there is a catch. If they get too close they loose their power. Basically the super hero in them dies when they get romantically involved. So if we want superheroes to exist no Theron/Smith romance. Good right? maybe.

What I see is this statement: Blacks and Whites cannot really get together romantically without a sacrifice of self. Basically you lose something when you do, further what you lose is ultimately no good. When there are no superheroes in the film crime goes up. So this means black white sex=crime goes up. Theron and Smith cannot get together for the sake of the safety of the world. Blacks and Whites cannot get together for the safety of the world…really?

Hancock: What White people think Happens when Black People Get Power?

Saw Hancock a few days ago. The film was disappointing for  a few reasons, but numero uno was the racial narrative.

Basically you got Hancock (Will Smith) who is this drunk, belligerent,  reluctant-superhero and everytime he “saves” people he ruins a bunch of LA. One day he saves Jason Bateman and so Bateman decides to help Hancock transform his image. This is the storyline a lot of people probably saw.

What I saw was this: You have this black dude who has no idea of how to handle his great powers.  He does some good, but is routinely making a bunch of other matters worse.  That is until he comes into contact with the holy white dude bateman, who takes black dude Will under his care and helps show the irresponsible black guy how to handle and manage his power.

It is like. Hey black people are not only bad with money and showing up to work on time, but they are also sub par superheroes without white people. Great.

Thanks Hollywood. Thanks for broadcasting the idea that black people don’t know what to do when they get power.  Perhaps this is suggesting that if Obama gets to be Prez he will so so def need a white VP to make sure he doesn’t get drunk all the damn time and blow up the world.

Gotta love Racism…it brings in box office dollars.

Super Celibate: Why Superheroes Cannot have Sex

Superman…Not Getting any

Spiderman…Not Getting any

Batman…Not Getting any

Hancock…Not Getting Any

The Hulk…Not Getting Any

Rogue…Not Getting Any

Suffice to say there are quite a few superheroes are not able to hit the skins. Despite having romantic interests, none of these super heroes are able to taker their relationships to the “next level.” Superman has super sperm that would send a shot gun blast through any lady (he cannot control bodily functions like a heartbeat or an ejaculation). Batman studies zen buddhism before dawning a cape and therefore can’t fornicate. Hancock becomes mortal and therefore not super if he spends too much time with his love Charlize Theron. The Hulk turns into a monster every time his heart rate gets above 160 or something…sex is a workout and he can’t get excited, so no boinking. Rogue puts dudes in comas if she so much as kisses them. And Spiderman has radioactive sperm…that shit is worse than the HIV.

These are facts, but the question of why is still largely unanswered. Why is it that these superheroes cant score with the proverbial cheerleader?

My theory is this:

Romantic sex leads to more romantic attachment. And since these superheroes all have partners they “love”  without sex, involving sex would tip their relationships into a whole nother galaxy of seriousness. If a superhero were to fuck one of the leading ladies they would have to deal with all of the stuff that comes with greater romantic attachment. They would have to deal with the vulnerability, the pain, the potential loss, the frustration, the agony, the self-consciousness. They would be human because they would no longer be invincible. Their humanity would negate their superness. Therefore in order to hold onto some semblance of power…physical and emotional they cannot have sex.

Of course, you can have sex without greater romantic attachment, but since the creators don’t want these superheroes being perceived as sluts…that is not an option…so they just make it impossible for them to have sex in the first place.